I am TC. I am THE true Prophet.
I have Received a direct Communique from the Ethereal Host.
I bring to you today the start of my unique pragmatic approach to help you, the beginning Cult leader, make your vision a reality. With the assistance of the venerable Madelaine McMasters, LWL Cult leader, and Dr. Daniels, I will bring to you my Transcriptions of Enlightenment that should help you get started on your Divine Quest.
Why start a CULT: to keep up with the Joneses'
Why drink Kool-Aid: Gypsy did. Lillie did. Dee did. Auntie Ave did. Perfect disciples.
Why pick only one CULT: Dilettantism is the mark of an Amateur.
Some tips for your followers:
Familiarise yourself with the specifications for sacrificial victims, and ensure that unacceptable substitutes cannot be unexpectedly introduced into the ceremony. If the penalty for not-to-specs work is death and/or mutilation, consider working for a more fault-tolerant deity.
Avoid needless embarrassment. Have your disciples practise the correct pronunciation of your name in the privacy of their own room before chanting it in public.
When mutilating pixelated avatars avoid the ones without testicles.
Instead of picking human victims who are young, virginal and innocent see if you can substitute Spammers, gypsys, and other avatars who won't be missed.
When the Black Mass goes awry, stay away from the Evil Pep.
Always remember fluorescent lighting is very annoying.
Vol. II coming soon...
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